I met with Dr. Harper about two weeks ago to discuss what the next steps were in my reconstruction process. Initially, the plan was to have one final surgery…swap the expander with an implant, make some lingering cosmetic updates to both boobs, and my favorite…fat grafting to inject in my cancer boob.
At my appointment, Dr. Harper was again very happy with how my skin and boob were reacting to the expander, but unfortunately felt like it’s still too soon to remove it. I obviously was pushing for soon rather than later due to the proximity of the wedding….6 weeks away at this point, crazy!!
Upon hearing the news that Dr. Harper wanted to wait on removing the expander, I once again found myself fighting to keep back tears on his office table. I feel incredibly self-conscience right now because my right and left boobs are completely lopsided. It may not be noticeable to others when I have clothes on, but it’s the one thing I hone in on when I look at myself naked in the mirror.
I finally tried my wedding dress on for my first fitting last weekend, and aside from feeling like a stuffed sausage in the dress (mama’s got some work to do in the fitness department), I was totally self-conscience that my boobs looked uneven. Not really something I want to be worrying about on my wedding day.
I don’t know if he noticed that I was getting upset, but Dr. Harper went on to propose a compromise that I’m very happy with….he’ll make the cosmetic changes I want and match my left boob in symmetry to my right before the wedding if I agree to keep the expander in for a good while longer. Done!!
The expander is slightly firmer than an implant would be, but the most important thing to me right now is that I look symmetrical. So Dr. Harper agreeing to do that makes me so happy!! And the best part, he was able to squeeze me into his schedule for the 16th, so that means I’ll be going back into the operating room tomorrow at 1pm!! I’m so excited and have been praying things go smoothly tomorrow and that I come out looking like a million bucks!
Many of you know Andrew and I want to try to have kids immediately after the wedding. With the expander being left in for at least a few more months, there is the chance that I could get pregnant before Dr. Harper is ready to swap it out. Dr. Harper assured me that it wouldn’t be detrimental to my pregnancy and that after the baby was born, we could back and make the exchange for an implant.
All in all, good news on all fronts. I’m looking forward to tomorrow and even more excited about seeing the results of the surgery. If you’re feeling like you’re in a generous mood, I’ll take whatever positive thoughts and vibes you can send my way for a successful surgery!! Thank you in advance
I don’t have any new hair progress pictures yet. I do have some photos of my hair in it’s natural state now. I blow dry and style my hair every day now that it’s longer….and get a lot of questions about whether or not all of the curl I had in the year following chemo has grown out…so I thought I would show you what my hair looks like now if I just let it air dry…pretty fugly if you ask me!!